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Mommie Diary-Losing motivation

Oh Diary,

I do NOT feel like doing anything anymore. You can tell considering I have not written in awhile. Nothing has changed from the last time I have written. All the same old crap.

Wake up at 6am or 7am, drink my water, do excercises, get kids up, get pissed looking at my lazy husband sleeping while I make breakfast, get kids up and clean.

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

So tired of it all.

This last Monday he promised to stay off the video games. Damn liar.

Kids had two days off of school. They thought they would get to play some games before daddy dearest woke up. Second he heard the game load he jumped off the sofa hovering over the kids telling them they cant play long.

Tuesday he asked what needed to be done around the apartment. Like he was going to help. Nope he sat down on the sofa glued to his phone before glueing himself to the video game. I was stuck cleaning alone. Sure one son offered to help but I wanted him to catch up on some missing school work.

My brother in Law sent me a you tube link to my nephews 8th grade graduation. Wanted to hurry and get my chores done so I could sit and watch. You cant imagine how excited I was to be able to see my adorable nephew. I have not seen him in several years. But apparently the school thought we would NOT want to see the kids. They were suppose to stand as their names were read. Camera stayed focused on the podium where the Principal sat. I cried and cried and cried. Sounds silly but damn I wanted to see him so bad.

Photo by Olya Kobruseva on Pexels.com

My whole day was ruined. Sat in the bathroom not able to control my emotions.

It is now Wednesday. Woke up at 6am. Tired, Depressed and Sad. Hate having to deal with another day in my own personal living hell. Funny today was a very hot day actually felt like hell in my small crowed 3 bedroom apartment. And no we do NOT have an air conditioner. Apparently Seattle does not believe one needs an air conditioned apartment. You know what it is like to cook in this weather? I was sweating my butt off while my husband was busy by the fan playing his game.

Forced myself to get in some Yoga time. Hoped it would help focus on some happy thoughts. Or at least clear my head. I was wrong. (Really need to find a place to live to where I can do yoga outside in peace and quiet)

Tomorrow should be cooler. Thank GOD!. I need to start prepping for our big move to Texas. Noticed how I said “I”? I have to find the place to live, I have to find jobs for him, I have to find movers, I have to decide what to pack. Of course I will be the one to pack. I just hope to find a place with a yard. We dont live in a good area and dont have a yard. We have a tiny patio and no scenery.

To make matters worse there is a damn pot head who likes to park his car under my damn window blaring his damn music. He does NOT live here. That crap is legal in this state so please tell me why the hell he can’t find someplace else to go.

Guess this is the end with my depressing rant. Talk to you whenever…..( Too lazy to edit the photos I wanted to use for my blog that is how crappy I have been feeling)

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