What really can I say that I have not bitched or complained about in the last several entries? All the same. Everything and every day. Husband wont help. Kids just want to play games. And then there is ME….
Me who complains because this last year all I have done is cook, clean, take care of kids and dogs.
I feel lost. I feel tired and I feel defeated.
Do NOT ever get me wrong, I love my kids more than life. I love being their mom. We have plenty of good times. I know they love me. But they do fight with each other and they fight with me on school. And they do not clean up after themselves. Well to be fair (C) will help out a bit more than the others. Just last week when he saw how tired and sad I was, he cleaned. That help wias so very much appreciated. But (R) literally takes after his father. If he changes his clothes he will dump them in the middle of the bedroom floor waiting for me to pick them up. Why? What would happen if I did not pick them up? Would they eventually get a clue? No!
The highlight of my weekend was getting our Nespresso order, getting donuts for our weekend breakfast and buying good real pizza. No nasty Pizza Hut or Dominoes but yummy more expensive Round Table. I practically starved myself just so I can stuff my face with several slices of a combo pizza.
What made me sad about this weekend was that there was no Sunday snuggle. Why because the kids wanted to take turns playing my husbands new Playstation. I spent the weekend alone. Well (R) still wanted to have coffee time. So from 5pm-6pm was spent drinking our coffee with some dessert watching a couple of episodes of Friends.
In short I have no idea what to do, how to do it or where I need to go to feel better. I feel almost like I am too old for a career change and the job I am trained for cant get a job. Too out dated and no one wants to bother with catching me up to speed. All I have is this going no where Diary(Blog) to which nothing but daily complaints of my sucky life.
Well going to end this. I found a lovely bedtime yoga that will not interfer with my healing. Again did some damage to breast tissue. I have to find a better fitting bra. I also found a good bedtime tea to try. Good night.