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Valentines Weekend-Journal

February 12th – Friday

Dear Diary,

Not much to say. Usually I hate this time of year. I feel more depressed than other months. But before I get into that I will tell you how today was an easy day with the kids. (G) skipped his one hour on zoom. He promised he would do his other paragraph and I Ready. He did the research needed in order to write his paragraph then wrote it without any issues. I knew he could do it. I apparently need to sit right next to him during the whole process.

The other kids did what they needed to do in regards to school work. I think they were being good because they did not want to miss the chance of playing outside. Snow was in the forcast and they love the snow. It is a nice and welcomed change beside the everyday rain that Seattle gets.

Photo by Prashant Gautam on Pexels.com

Anyway, I hate this time of the year. Not because of the snow, the rain, the cold or even the fact of Valentines day. It is because this is the month(weekend) my baby would have turned 11….I suffered a horrible miscarriage at aroun 3 1/2 months. Threw me into a state of depression. Hell still get depressed because of the incident. The emotional pain was 100x worse then the physical pain. Non stop bleeding led me into the operating room. My husband has seem to have gotten over it just fine but 11 years later it still hurts me.

Well I do not feel like writing anymore. Going to go to bed. Just not feeling it today. Good night


February 13th-Saturday

Dear Diary,

Did NOT sleep. Too many thoughts and (C) kepts checking outside for snow. We had flurries last night. Did not think it would be anything more than that but as the night went on the heavier it became. I am such a kid when it comes to snow and went out around midnight.

This morning we all woke up at 7am got warm clothes, gloves, hats and jackets on and took off outside. We had a winter storm warning for today and wow was it a storm. Kids were in Heaven and so was mommie. After about a couple of hours we all came in for breakfast and hot chocolate. They took off the layers and socks at the door. I gathered them up and tossed in the dryer to get dry for when we went out next. (C) quickly ate while staring out the patio window. You can see the happiness in his face. You can see the happiness in all their faces.

After we got warm and after lunch we took off outside again. (M) wanted to walk to the forrested area away from people to play. He was shaking the snow off the trees onto his brothers. He tried to help build a snowman and he had a soft snowball fight with them. I said soft because 1. snow was fluffy soft 2. I make sure he carefully grabbed the top soft layer. I got hit once with a snowball that the person was not aware it had a small rock in it. Did NOT feel good.

Two hours we were all out playing. Once toes start to go numb its time to get inside to warm up. They moaned and groaned but I scared them with frost bite and the possibility of losing a toe or two. Clothes were immediately tossed into the dry.

Our patio was covered with snow and the dogs were going crazy. While the kids were getting warmed I took out the dogs. They were just the cutest. Jumping and rolling through the snow. It was a fight getting them back into the house. Just as bad as the kids. My basset did not seem to be getting cold but my tiny shih tzu was shivering. Weird how she did not care and did not want to go back inside. But I worried and had to get her warmed up.

Took the kids out for one last time. This time they went to the playground. (C) and (G) love to go down the snow filled slides while (M) had fun on the swing. (R) just had fun tossing up the snow over his own head. After yet another 2 hours of playing it was dinner time. I was also getting so very tired. Plus it was late and the temperature dropped alot.

Soup and biscuites for dinner. Yum… Warmed out tummies.

Dogs were sound asleep. Kids were in nice dry jammies and in blankets watching T.V. I had warm clothes on and was also in bed but for some reason could not get my body temp to regulate. So I hopped into a nice hot bath. It helped alot.

I am extremely exhausted. Busy snow day of play took its toll on my old ass body. But so damn worth it to see my kids happy.

Too tired to read. So I am going to end this and get to bed. Kids have already passed out. Night Night

So Pretty… Snow makes our crappy complex look nice.

FEBRUARY 14th- VALENTINES DAY

Dear Diary,

Got up at around 8:30 am. Did not want to move at all…. Kids were still very sound asleep. My chance to run to the car and grab their Valentines. I walked around and enjoyed the falling snow a bit before going inside. I was able to make their bags before they woke up. Dogs got a valentine as well. Never ever will I exclude my doggie babies.

Kids were happy with their bags of candy but they wanted to go out before the snow went away. So out we went…(C) and (G) were the only two that wanted to go. We walked around but then went to the playground. First thing they did was go down the slides. Which for (G) did not go well…. He slide down way to fast and landed pretty hard on his little buns. So hard that it knocked the wind out of him. His poor little face filled with fear and panic as he thought he was dying. I knew it wasnt serious but still…Told him to calm down, relax and take a slow deep breath. Once he did he was up and playing around. Not on the slide of course… His poor back side will feel it in the morning.

An hour later we went inside for breakfast.

Husband was still asleep on the sofa. Figured as much that he forgot Valentines day. Kind of hurt my feeling. Dont know why because I pretty much expected it. I knew also that he would have used the snow as an excuse as to why he did not do anything. Which yes he did but I had to remind him that I was very much prepared for the kids. He could have ordered something or when he was out Monday he could have gotten something. Ugh whatever my kids were happy and my kids only matter.

I cleaned up pretty much the rest of the day. Washed all the wet clothes. Made dinner. And snuggled with my little love with the hurt buns. He was so adorable with the heating pad under him.

I’ts raining out and kids are sad but thankful.

Very tired still so I will be turning in early yet again. Kids have a week off which mean no school stress for me. I’m sure there will be some other kind of stress but at least no fighting them to get on to zoom or to get the freaken work done. I think I will take a week off as well….Relax and read….

Good night.

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